iPsycho (2010)

In this short film, Cat Vicious (Kim Santiago) is a nihilistic shock jock who runs a podcast where she is as crude and outspoken as she wants. During her latest show, a creepy caller tells her he is going to make her pay for her callousness on the show. He kidnaps her sidekick, pirates her frequency and seals up the radio station so there is no hope of escape. Can Cat escape or will she be signing off for the last time?

Clocking in at just 15 minutes, iPsycho is an effective and extremely well-made short from filmmaker Chris R. Notarile. We reported on his last short film, One Night Stand and are glad to see his latest with iPsycho.

For a low-budget short (made for about $50!!!!), iPsycho looks fantastic. From the different camera angles to the effective lighting, the film looks highly professional and polished. Plus, the acting is great! I especially enjoyed the feisty character of Cat Vicious as played by Kim Santiago (who also co-wrote the script with director Notarile). I loved her strong personality and the fact that she fought back against her tormentor. All of the other actors, including DeVille Vannik/Chris R. Notarile sharing duties as the killer, Cheryl Alessio as Vicious’ sidekick Debbie Drone and Christopher Piccione as the producer, Soupy, were awesome and really sold their roles. All of the performances came off as very natural and every actor was believable.

Also, despite that the film follows a tried and true slasher formula along the lines of When a Stranger Calls, it still manages to entertain. Again, I think this has a great deal to do with the colorful characters and fantastic performances. However, props must also be given to writers Santiago and Notarile for the engaging dialogue and avoiding stereotypical “damsel in distress” characters. I also liked the unexpected ending that adds a little jolt to the proceedings.

iPsycho is another great short from director Notarile and I eagerly await future endeavors he undertakes! This director shows a lot of promise and I can’t wait to see what he does next! Whatever he does, I hope he decides to work with Santiago again, because the two of them have created something special and particularly engaging with iPsycho.

One of the coolest things about Notarile? He usually releases his short films online, free of charge, for everyone to check out! Check out Blinky Productions’ Official Site!

President's Day (2010)

You know what I think? That you can never have enough holiday-themed horror movies! So I eagerly looked forward to watching President’s Day! An added bonus is that it’s helmed by filmmaker Chris LaMartina, whose previous films, Book of Lore and Grave Mistakes, we raved about. LaMartina continues his winning streak with President’s Day, a fun indie film that’s a throwback to classic ’80s slashers!

The plot is pretty simple: A killer dressed like Abraham Lincoln is murdering high schoolers who are running for student council. Barry (Bennie Mack McCay IV) joins the race to get closer to new student and fellow candidate Joanna (Lizzy Denning), but finds himself embroiled in a mystery where everyone is a suspect, including snotty popular girl Chelsea (Nicolette Faye), the sleazy janitor (Lee Armstrong) and Officer Kennedy (Ryan Thomas). Can Barry figure out who the killer is before its his turn to get axed?

Chris LaMartina (who directed and co-wrote) again proves that he is a major talent to watch with President’s Day! First off, the film looks fantastic – it has excellent lighting, interesting shots and overall looks extremely professional. It definitely takes skill and talent to make an independent feature, and it’s safe to say LaMartina has both in spades! This is one filmmaker that you actually want to see more from!

Secondly, the story, written by LaMartina and Jimmy George, is simple but throws enough red herrings throughout (that are actually believable) to keep you on your toes. When the final reveal comes as to the killer’s identity, I was actually surprised! And it wasn’t some random character, either, but actually made logical sense! I also enjoyed how each of the characters was developed just enough, and while some of them were stereotypes of high school students, this actually worked with the comedic aspects of the film. I especially liked one particular scene that shows all the stereotypes when Barry is trying to get some information from the students…it definitely made me giggle!

The comedy in the film is never overpowering, though, and there are plenty of horrific kills throughout the film! I was impressed with the films high body count – A LOT of people, kids, and even pets get killed! I especially liked the death of a jock involving a trophy and another one involving a goth girl getting an eye gouged out! The film doesn’t discriminate against the crippled either…the first kill features a wheelchair-bound candidate getting axed! My only complaint is that the kills were a bit anti-climactic and were pretty quick.

Still, that is a tiny complaint in comparison to how I felt about the high quality of the film. Even the acting, usually one of the weakest points for an indie production, blew me away! Every single actor was phenomenal and I couldn’t pick a bad performance out of the bunch! This wasn’t a simple production with just a few lead characters, either, but required the talents of numerous actors, both lead, supporting and extras. I was impressed by the talent of the large cast and the ability of LaMartina to really direct all the actors so that they gave the best possible performances.

President’s Day is a fun throwback film that is well-made, well-acted and just a joy to watch! This again proves that indie filmmaker Chris LaMartina is one talent to watch!

President’s Day will premiere at the Charles Theater in Baltimore on (what else) President’s Day, February 15th, 2010.

For more info, visit President’s Day on Facebook and Twitter!

Book Review: The Best of Joe R. Lansdale

Even if you don’t think you’ve ever heard of Joe R. Lansdale, I bet you have. Have you seen Bubba Ho-Tep? Or perhaps watched the Masters of Horror episode Incident On and Off a Mountain Road? Well, both of those were adapted (pretty faithfully, I might add) from Lansdale stories. The witty, outrageous and unforgettable dialogue from Bubba Ho-Tep is pure Lansdale while the heart-stopping action in Incident shows he can build a terrifying story.

I was fortunate enough to receive an early review copy of The Best of Joe R. Lansdale, due out March 2010, which collects many of Lansdale’s most acclaimed, weird and wondrous stories! The collection features sixteen of Lansdale’s short stories, including the previously mentioned Bubba Ho-Tep, Incident On and Off a Mountain Road, as well as Mad Dog Summer (my personal favorite from this particular collection), Godzilla’s Twelve Step Program, the non-fiction Hell Through a Windshield and many more odd and outrageous stories!

Lansdale’s writing style ranges from shocking to sentimental, but always surprises with its down-home style and wicked wit. All of the stories contained in this collection are well worth reading. Lansdale’s outlaw-style writing, complete with colorful characters and provocative settings, pops from the pages and makes you eagerly beg for more remarkable tales. This is Texan storytelling at its best – rude, crude and offensive! His stories have a tall tale feel to them, and though they contain many unpleasant circumstances and characters there is also an underlying sentimentality to them. They are both sweet and sour, but leave the reader satisfied in the end.

My favorite story in the collection is Mad Dog Summer, about a young boy in backwoods 1930’s East Texas who finds himself caught up in a sinister and grisly murder mystery. The story is built around the legend of the Goat Man, who legend says roams the woods and preys upon wayward folk. This story sent chills up my spine, especially as told from the point of view of a young boy. The frightening images of the Goat Man standing on the edge of the woods pretty much made me want to dive under the covers. It also deals with issues of racism, harsh (in)justice, intolerance, growing up and learning to do the right thing no matter what. These themes and the well-drawn characters as well as the details that Lansdale incorporates into the story really pulled me in. I truly did not want to put this story down and had to read it from beginning to end!

The strength of Lansdale’s stories rest squarely on the shoulders of his colorful characters, who are usually piss-full of vinegar and colorful language. They mainly hail from the hearty backwoods of Texas or other rural places, living hard lives and encountering many strange creatures, including zombies, mummies and even albino mules. Lansdale breathes spectacular life into these characters as he has them encounter some truly extraordinary experiences. And then there is just the pure and unbridled imagination of Lansdale – where else can you find a crotchety old Elvis stuck in a convalescent home with a black JFK or Godzilla on the road to recovery from his propensity to destroy things? There is nothing in horror literature like the characters in a Joe Lansdale story, that’s for sure!

The Best of Joe R. Lansdale is a must-have book for the lover of the weird, the champion of the bizarre and the fan of the outrageous. If you are looking for a unique experience that will leave you equal parts stunned and nostalgic, frightened and amused, look no further than the “high priest of Texan weirdness” himself, Joe Lansdale.

In Lansdale’s own infamous words, “Come on in – the weirdness is fine.”

Order it on Amazon!

Book Review: Vile Things - Extreme Deviations of Horror edited by Cheryl Mullenax

Horror anthologies are the perfect bite-sized treats to discover new authors as well as appreciate established ones. Though it’s always nice to see a story by a “master of horror” I much rather like discovering new talent within a good horror anthology. Much to my delight, there was plenty of “fresh blood” to be found within the pages of the horror anthology Vile Things – Extreme Deviations of Horror.

Unlike some horror anthologies, there is no clear theme of zombies or vampires in Vile Things – just solid short stories from the likes of Ramsey Campbell, Graham Masterton, C.J. Henderson and many other horror authors, including some new names I’m now glad to be acquainted with. All of the stories are not for the faint of heart, as many times I found myself squirming and cringing at the disturbing and disgusting tales of horror held between the anthology’s pages. The title of Vile Things definitely says it all! In this fast-paced collection of 15 stories, I thought all were horrific, but a few stood out more than the rest.

My favorite short story was Maggots by Tim Curran. Set during the Napoleonic Wars, both on the killing fields as well as the main character’s hometown of Paris, Maggots is a grotesque tale of cannibalism and possession. Except that instead of a demon taking possession of the main character’s body, the host’s body is invaded and taken over by maggots that force him to eat the putrefied remains of humans. There is a lot of gore within this particular story, all made all the more disturbing in the detailed descriptions the author gives of the main character feasting on the bloated and rotting remains of corpses, all the while all too fully aware of the atrocities he is committing.

Another one of my favorites was Z.F. Kilgore’s tale, The Devil Lives in Jersey. I love Jersey Devil stories and this one definitely doesn’t disappoint. An ex-police detective moves to the Pine Barrens after inheriting a house from his deceased grandparents hoping to give himself and his son a fresh start. Soon, though, the town’s dark secrets involving a witch burning, mysterious disappearances and grisly murders come to the surface, and the ex-detective discovers his family is inexplicably linked to the town’s bloody past…and now it seems that something is killing again. This short story was extremely well-written, with heaps of disturbing imagery (characters eating baby corpses and a witch having sex with something otherworldly, among other graphic scenes) and felt like it had so much to offer that it would be better suited as its own book. I hear that Kilgore, a retired police detective himself, has more short stories planned around the main character, and I eagerly await them!

Other favorites included the cheeky Tenant’s Rights by Sean Logan, in which an off-kilter, nerdy tenant gets revenge on his playboy roommate/landlord, but with disastrous results. I loved seeing the arrogant landlord get his comeuppance, but it was also satisfying to watch the creepy roommate get his at the end of the story! I also enjoyed Coquettrice, by Angel Leigh McCoy, a disturbing look at a satanic cult hatching their very own cockatrice…and watching the main character change from innocent to deviant was pretty jarring as well! What You Wish For by Garry Bushell was an extremely satisfying tale as well, and much like Tenant’s Rights, we get to watch a vile character meet her bloody end.

I’ve only mentioned a few outstanding stories, but with few exceptions all the tales within Vile Things are marvelously macabre! They will make you feel nauseous (Fungoid by Randy Chandler), give you the creeps (The Worm by John Bruni) or just plain scare you (Again by Ramsey Campbell). The anthology’s stories contain incest, rape, deformities, abnormalities, the disabled, infestations, demons, monsters and plenty of graphic gore, blood and other bodily fluids that will have you wishing you read it on an empty stomach! The book definitely lives up to its title of Vile Things – Extreme Deviations of Horror so prepare to be disturbed and make sure you have a barf bag handy before reading!

Buy it on Amazon!

Poultrygeist (2008)

Make sure you’ve got your seat belts fastened tightly, because Poultrygeist is one wild ride. Filled with puke, poop, killer poultry, putrescent gore and plenty of bad nudity, Poultrygeist shows Troma at its trashy (and socially-conscious) best!

Arbie (Jason Yachanin) and Wendy (Kate Graham) vowed they’d always be together…but a year after consummating their love in the Tromahawk Indian Burial Ground Wendy has come back to town a changed woman. She is in town protesting the bulldozing of the burial ground and the erection of fast food joint American Chicken Bunker in its place with her militant girlfriend Mickie (Allyson Sereboff). Yep, Wendy has turned into a lipstick lesbian much to the chagrin of lovesick Arbie. He vows to get her back and promptly takes a job at American Chicken Bunker. He joins the colorful group of employees, including high-strung manager Denny (Joshua Olatunde), backwoods dead chicken f*cker Carl Jr. (Caleb Emerson), gay Mexican Paco Bell (Khalid Rivera), and burka-clad Humus (Rose Ghavami) who has her own prayer mat in the kitchen to pray to Mecca every day.

Besides the angry protesters outside, Arbie and his co-workers must also deal with the angry spirits of displaced Native Americans as well as the souls of all the chickens American Chicken Bunker has slaughtered. Soon, people start ending up dead and/or start turning into horrific (and hungry) chicken-like zombies.

Can Arbie and his friends save the world? More importantly, can Arbie win Wendy back in the process?

Troma’s take-no-prisoners humor is readily apparent in this gloriously low-brow film and everyone from liberals to minorities to huge corporations get skewered. I especially liked how no group was left unscathed…as soon as fun was poked at big corporations, they’d switch it around and start making fun of the protestors standing against big business. Of course, this being a Troma film it’s also heavy on toilet humor…dick and fart jokes abound and this definitely isn’t a film for those easily offended!!

You expect the toilet humor (like a guy having massive diarrhea…from the point of view of the toilet bowl, someone adding his own “special sauce” to the fast food, chicken carcasses getting raped, etc.) from a Troma film, but what surprised me was the high quality of the special FX! The budget for Poultrygeist was pretty low, but they still managed to pull off some amazing effects. Highlights included a zombie hand going through someone’s ass and out their mouth, a meat grinder accident with a spectacular spray of blood, someone’s face getting cut into perfect deli slices in a meat slicer, dozens of people throwing up green puke and tons of other gross-out moments. The effects in the film were impressive and by far some of the best shown in any Troma film in the indie studio’s 35 year career!

Also a personal best for a Troma film was the acting in Poultrygeist. The actors gave it their all here, with very enthusiastic performances. Even though the characters were way over the top, you couldn’t help cheer for them anyway. In the wrong actors’ hands, the quirky characters could have quickly fallen flat…Luckily, we get a near-perfect cast that delivers and hams it up just enough without going too overboard in this over-the-top film! They even manage some fun musical numbers!

Yep, I said musical numbers! These will even be enjoyable to those that normally don’t like musicals (trust me, I watched this film with my musical-hating boyfriend and even he loved it). The lyrics, including songs about sex, bodily fluids, love, and more sex (usually of the anal variety), are just so damn offensive that they are plain hilarious. Plus, the audio is great and the actors can really sing! The songs even manage to propel the narrative along and aren’t just there for schlock value (though they do help!). We even get to see Uncle Lloyd (wearing a skirt, no less) join in on one of the musical numbers as he sings and dances!

Poultrygeist also tackles some socially conscious issues and though they are covered in poop and puke (and chicken feathers), the message still shines clear. The take jabs at big business, fickle and hypocritical protestors, consumerism, American’s fast-food addictions and so on. And through it all you’ll be laughing your ass off…unless you’re blowing chunks, that is!

Poultrygeist is the most fun you’ll have with chicken-zombies, Native American spirits (the ghostly kind, not the alcoholic kind), lesbians, skirt-wearing men and fast food this year! This is a fowl, gross-out movie that super-sizes the fun and comes with an extra side of AWESOME!

Available from Amazon!

RetarDEAD (2008)

RetarDEAD is a sequel of sorts to filmmakers Rick Popko and Dan West’s Monsturd. Though I haven’t seen Monsturd, I found myself easily engaged in the storyline of RetarDEAD, which takes most of the same characters from Monsturd and places them in another scenario where the evil Dr. Stern (Dan Burr) has survived from the last film and decides to try a different experiment. Instead of creating a giant poop monster, Dr. Stern turns to special education students and begins to inject them with a serum that accelerates their intelligence. Instead of making macaroni artwork, the kids are soon reading War and Peace and Dr. Stern is praised by parents and administrators alike. The only problem is that the serum has some nasty side effects…namely turning the students into zombies! When the zombies get loose and start infecting the entire town, the local screwball cops must take a break from trying to track down the town’s “Weiner Wagger” and focus on stopping Dr. Stern and his flesh-eating zombies!

RetarDEAD is an enjoyable and completely silly low budget film that’ll have you alternately laughing and puking! Think of RetarDEAD like a Troma film crossed with the riotously raunchy comedy of a Broken Lizard film (i.e. Supertroopers) drenched in copious amounts of gore! Writers/directors Rick Popko and Dan West (who also play the clueless cops) have created a gross-out horror comedy that even features funny faux trailers for films and a lobby commercial that happily advertises a “Cleveland Steamer” sandwich! They also managed to get some sweet cameos for the film. Jello Biafra, ex-lead singer of the band the Dead Kennedy’s, makes an appearance as town mayor, the Living Dead Girlz put on a killer performance, and even the reclusive Herschell Gordon Lewis contributes a voice over for the film!

This is a low-budget film, so I wasn’t expecting much in the acting department, which is probably a good thing since the acting is definitely not one of the film’s strong points! My two favorite actors were, surprisingly, Popko and West in the roles of the bumbling cops. Their repertoire is just hilarious and they get some of the best lines in the film!

Other negatives include the editing and the script, which could have both used some tightening up. There are numerous scenes that drag on way too long and seem to exist solely to pad the running time (which is roughly about an hour and a half). I kept reaching for the fast forward button during these lulls in action where nothing much (not even dialogue between characters) was happening. Also, the script meanders in the beginning and while there are some hilarious scenes involving the notorious “Wiener Wagger” in the movie, that subplot really has no bearing on the rest of the film.

Despite these flaws, I had a knee-slapping good time with RetarDEAD. There’s been some talk about the incendiary title that some people have taken offensively, but the film really doesn’t stoop to making (too much) fun of the special education students. Once they become zombies and infect the entire town, everyone pretty much becomes equal and there aren’t really any “slow zombie” jokes thrown around. With that said, the film still manages to make hilariously inappropriate jokes…just wait for the gag in the porno store!

The film’s gore is also a real treat, and most scenes are covered in red! The special FX were done by seasoned FX artist Ed Martinez and his talent contributes to the success of the film. We get limbs torn from bodies, bloody shoot-outs and the film’s crowning achievement, a torso ripped in half by a hungry zombie horde!

If you are looking for a dirty, devious and laugh-out-loud funny low-budget B-movie, RetarDEAD will surely float your boat. A mix of John Waters’ “anything goes” attitude, Herschell Gordon Lewis’ graphic gore and Troma’s wacky DIY spirit, RetarDEAD is a “special” film you won’t want to miss!

Buy it on Amazon!

Class of Nuke 'Em High (1986)

Class of Nuke ‘Em High is an utterly outrageous, gross-out spoof of the typical 80’s high school comedy from your favorite independent studio, Troma!

The students at Tromaville High School are noticing some strange things happening ever since the nuclear power plant next door had a suspicious leak. For one, the once geeky honor society now terrorized the halls as vicious, leather-clad, motorcycle-riding Cretins (really, their name is The Cretins). Chrissy and Warren, the archtypical “golden couple” at school get thrown into the confusion when they smoke a joint that contains radiation from the marijuana grown inside the nuclear plant. Chrissy gets pregnant, miscarries a squirmy, black worm-looking thing, while Warren gets some ‘roid rage (complete with pulsating pustules) and falls on the Cretins bad side after beating them up. It all leads to a final showdown at the high school between the Cretins, Chrissy and Warren, and the slimy, hungry mutant that’s been growing in the basement.

Probably one of the better done and more well-known Troma flicks, Class of Nuke ‘Em High delivers surefire zany fun. This is actually one of the first Troma films I’ve ever seen, but I was pleasantly surprised by how much I actually enjoyed the movie. It is completely over-the-top, farcical and features gratuitous nudity and gross-out gags, but I still loved it. My favorite aspect was all the crazy characters, especially the Cretins. I was pretty much rooting for them the entire time, especially the hot leader of the pack!

The gore was surprisingly very well-done for an early Troma film. One scene features Warren punching his fist all the way down a Cretin’s throat! A nerd oozing green slime out of his mouth was also a pretty neat scene. The best effect, though, was probably the mutant spawn at the end of the film. The creature was pretty impressive and looked great! And of course, what’s a Troma film without nudity? Class of Nuke ‘Em High has its fair share of boobie shots.

The film also features some very black humor regarding the U.S. government and nuclear testing. Some might say it crosses the line of poor taste, but to me it was absolutely riotous!

The film’s only downfall is its meandering storyline that takes its sweet time getting anywhere. Many of the scenes, including plentiful shots of students just milling about the high school, were repetitive and unnecessary, almost like they were trying to pad the film for time. There isn’t even a stable lead character to latch onto and root for. The whole film is over-the-top, including the acting, which some people might be turned off by.

Still, despite its flaws, Class of Nuke ‘Em High is a very entertaining film for those that like silly, irrelevant horror-comedies. To me, it felt like a mix of Fast Times at Ridgemont High, Rock ‘N’ Roll High School and, Troma’s earlier effort, The Toxic Avenger.

Whether you are a fan of Troma films or not, I recommend checking out Class of Nuke ‘Em High for some brainless, B-movie fun!

Available on Amazon!

Street Trash (1987)

Street Trash is a wonderfully offensive, trashy and gooey film that features people who melt into Technicolor puddles, a penis pick-up football game, bum fights, necrophilia, tons of great comedy and violence. It’s a hard-knock life…

A liquor store owner finds a case of old hooch in his basement. He decides to sell it for $1 a pop, the perfect price for the large homeless community that lives on skid row. Unfortunately, anyone who drinks the stuff immediately starts melting into blues, purples, greens, yellows and reds and their remains end up looking like crayons that were left too long in the sun. There are also several sub-plots involving two homeless brothers and the junk yard where they live, a girl who tries to help them out, a cop’s involvement in the suspicious death of a mob boss’ girlfriend and a particularly crazy and violent Vietnam vet who rules over the homeless class by sheer brutality.

I absolutely loved this movie! Its offensive comedy along with the great gore scenes won me over, even if it did feature some questionable acting and paper-thin plot. It is just a fun, entertaining ride through the mean streets of the ‘80s. It reminded me a lot of something Troma might make today, because no big budget film could get away with Street Trash’s decidedly un-PC viewpoints. Everyone is ragged on, from cops to the homeless and everyone in between.

One part that I did not enjoy was the portrayal of women in the film. Sure, pretty much everyone was portrayed in a bad light, but to me the women got the worst of it. First there’s the Vietnam vet’s companion, who is pretty much his slave and gets slapped around a whole lot. Then there is the mob boss’ girlfriend, who is drunk and gets taken to the junkyard to be raped, beaten and killed, only to be raped again. The only redeeming female character was perhaps the girl who works at the junk yard and tries to help the two homeless brothers. The exploitation of women in B-movies is nothing new, but it still rubs me the wrong way no matter how good the rest of the film is. Still, this was my only major complaint with the film.

The melting scenes are classic and the special effects are spectacular, especially considering the film’s low-budget. Two memorable scenes include one man who slowly melts into a toilet and another man who swells and then explodes in a shower of flesh and blood. Street Trash definitely delivers the goods in the “Ewwwww!” department.

For those interested, the social commentary of the film is also something to look into. The 1980’s were a prosperous time, but not for everyone. Government cutbacks on welfare and social programs left many people out in the street. This film reflects this and in turn shows us how bad it was for people who were forced to live on the street.

Street Trash is an amazing, one-of-a-kind gem of a film in the horror genre. It has many classic scenes and memorable lines that you’ll be repeating days (and most likely years) after viewing it. This B-movie may not be for anyone, but its cult status is cemented in cinematic history.

Available on Amazon!