Cabin in the Woods (2012)

Despite being sick on The Cabin in the Woods’ opening night, I still bundled up and trooped out to the theater because there was no way I was missing catching this flick on Friday the 13th! It has been one of my most anticipated movies of 2012 as 1.) I’m a big fan of Joss Whedon and 2.) it actually looked like it would do something fresh and different with the horror genre.

There has been a lot of hype and build-up surrounding this film, and just today I saw tons of Twitter and Facebook updates proclaiming how "______" Cabin in the Woods was. I hate when flicks get spoiled by too much hype, so I tried to put myself on a social media lockdown for the day to avoid any spoilage.

I avoided any spoilers, made it to the theater and decided for myself just how "______" Cabin in the Woods was...

In the film, five college kids head to a remote cabin for some weekend relaxation, but soon find that things aren’t exactly what they appear. Together, they must discover the truth behind the cabin in the woods.

The best way to see this movie is with little or zero knowledge of it, so I'll keep this review short and to the point (and spoiler-free). The film is pretty much a horror fan's wet dream, as it cleverly plays with expectations, toys with horror clichés, tips its hat to many horror films AND adds something quite different and unexpected to the horror movie formula.

I laughed, I jumped, I rooted for both sides and completely reveled in the sharp writing by Joss Whedon and Drew Goddard (who directed as well). The Cabin in the Woods is one heck of an entertaining time from start to finish and left me with a big goofy grin on my face hours after I watched it. That's pretty much all you need to know, besides the fact that it has many different facets to its seemingly simple story.

If you’re a horror fan that enjoys smart, original and witty horror films, then I highly encourage you to check it out ASAP! It was totally worth avoiding the hoopla on Facebook and Twitter all day and sucking up a fever/sore throat to watch it opening weekend. Believe me, this is one film that actually lives up to the buzz surrounding it and is definitely one you don't want to miss!

Team Mer-Man! (You'll understand when you see the flick...now go see it!!)

Book Review: The First Days by Rhiannon Frater

Egads, I thought when I first started Rhiannon Frater’s novel The First Days, another zombie book?? I adore zombies as much as any of my fellow horror loving freaks, but it seems that every other horror fiction I pick up nowadays is zombie-themed. However, I was excited to check out Frater’s first “officially” published novel. Frater has built up a lot of buzz over the past few years by self-publishing her novels online; in fact, The First Days actually started as a serial and garnered quite a devoted following! I am always stoked to find new authors who offer up new visions of horror, and I was ecstatic to discover that The First Days wasn’t any old, run-of-the-mill zombie novel, but instead offered a fresh take on the popular genre.

The First Days starts with a bang…and the rending and tearing of flesh as one bright morning the dead start coming back to life and devouring the living. Two strangers, Katie and Jenni, must band together to escape the suburbs and the horror of their zombified families and flee to the Texan countryside. The horror doesn’t end there, as they must battle the hordes of fast-moving undead to seek safety and shelter with other survivors in a small fortified town.

The First Days offers zombie fans several new aspects to the genre. First, it is set in the wide-open landscape of the hot Texan countryside. The isolated location seems ideal for this apocalyptic tale and despite the sparsely populated towns dotting the landscape, there are plenty of zombies to overwhelm our heroines. Frater also re-tools the zombie characters a bit as well, giving us the frightful notion of fast-moving, highly aggressive (and sometimes cognizant and intelligent) zombies. While this certainly isn’t a new perspective, it’s still nice to see something slightly tweaked that makes for an all-the-more terrifying read.

The most unique aspect of the novel is that it features two female leads (yay!). They are flawed, have their moments of weakness and sometimes even act a little silly (like crushing on a guy during a zombie siege), but they are also strong women who will do anything to protect each other and when zombies (or people who’ve been bitten and therefore infected) need to be put down, they get the job done. I definitely appreciated seeing strong female characters who were developed so well and who I truly came to admire and cheer on. The rest of the characters were also well-developed, and I especially took a special shine to Juan, a cowboy and resident zombie expert who kept bemoaning the fact that the zombies were fast instead of slow like in Romero’s films.

The First Days is the first book in a trilogy that will be released by Tor Books. The second and third installments, Fighting to Survive and Siege, will follow quickly on the heels of First Days’ July 2011 release. However, they cannot be released quickly enough for me, as I am eagerly anticipating Frater’s next two books in the series!

Available on Amazon!

The Weeping Woman (2011)

The Weeping Woman is a short film adapted from a short story by Paul Kane. It is about a man (Stephen Geoffreys) taking a short cut home to his family one snowy afternoon. After nearly running into a woman (Melissa Bostaph) standing in the middle of the road, he gets out to see if she is okay. She begs him to help “her children” and so he follows her into the isolated woods that border the side of the road. There in the snow-bound stillness he makes a shocking discovery…

I’ve been a big fan of Mark Steensland’s work, from his horror anthology Beyond the Pale, kick-ass graphic-novel adaptation Dead@17 (he should IMMEDIATELY be hired to helm the feature, hear me big studios?!) to his more recent short films Peekers and The Ugly File. This is a man who actually got me into critiquing horror films when I was lucky enough to take his horror movie film class back in college, so I have a huge amount of respect for Steensland. I think he has improved with every single one of his short films and The Weeping Woman is no different!

Firstly, I enjoyed how Steensland decided to set the film in winter instead of the summertime setting of Kane’s original story. I loved the desolate atmosphere the wintery setting gave the film.  Adding to the eerie feeling is Fabio Frizzi’s effective score. The Weeping Woman is the first short film Frizzi, who most well-known for collaborating on the horror films of Lucio Fulci, agreed to score. His distinctive sound fits very well in the film.

The film is also heightened by Steensland direction, which is polished and high quality. Many people think of short films as a filmmaker’s gateway to feature-length movies, but Steensland has shown time and time again that short films can be an art form in themselves and can be every bit as high quality and effective as full-length films. Besides boasting a professional look, The Weeping Woman also has a variety of camera angles that keep things visually interesting.

Equally deserving of praise is Stephen Geoffreys’ and Melissa Bostaph’s performances. Geoffreys’ is most known for his memorable side-kick acts in films like Fright Night, and while some of his goofiness is on-screen in The Weeping Woman (gotta love one of the first scenes that features him singing along to “Turn Up the Radio”), he delivers a wonderful “everyman” performance that makes you genuinely like, and root for, his character. Melissa Bostaph is also wonderful as the titular character “the weeping woman”. At first she displays such a sense of dismay and sorrow that, were you in Geoffreys’ character’s shoes, you also couldn’t help following her into the woods. When her true nature is revealed, you gotta admire her chutzpah in taking care of her nasty little monsters…errrr, I mean children. I gather this is her first film, but she really pulled off an amazing performance.

Hopefully The Weeping Woman will be making appearances at film festivals or otherwise be available for people to see soon, because this is one you do not want to miss and shows that Mark Steensland will soon become an even more well-known and respected name. Right now Steensland is horror’s best-kept secret, but I’m sure his talents will soon be discovered and appreciated by a far larger audience!

Wanna get in on the secret? For more info, visit www.marksteensland.com!

Black Death (2011)

According to Wikipedia, the Black Death was one of the most devastating pandemics in human history and is estimated to have killed 30% – 60% of Europe’s population, reducing the world’s population from an estimated 450 million to between 350 and 375 million in 1400. This has been seen as having created a series of religious, social and economic upheavals which had profound effects on the course of European history. It took 150 years for Europe’s population to recover.

The death and pestilence spread by this deadly plague was of Biblical proportions, and it seems that the dark mark it left upon history would be the perfect material for a horror film. Lucky for us, Magnolia Pictures’ Black Death has risen to the occasion.

The year is 1348. Europe has fallen under the shadow of the Black Death. As the plague decimates all in its path, fear and superstition are rife. In this apocalyptic environment, the church is losing its grip on the people. There are rumors of a village, hidden in marshland that the plague cannot reach. There is even talk of a necromancer who leads the village and is able to bring the dead back to life.

Ulric (Sean Bean), a fearsome knight, is charged by the church to investigate these rumors. He enlists the guidance of a novice monk, Osmund  (Eddie Redmayne) to lead him and his band of mercenary soldiers to the marshland, but Osmund has other motives for leaving his monastery. Their journey to the village and events that unfold take them into the heart of darkness and to horrors that will put Osmund’s faith in himself and his love for God to the ultimate test.

Black Death is a gripping film dealing with issues of faith, temptation, redemption, salvation…all huge issues back in the Dark Ages and still relevant today. It has a bit of Wicker Man-feel, only because of the dark secret the blissful and untouched village hides. It also has a much more somber feel and isn’t a film to take lightly. I liked how the film subverted the usual Christian vs. Pagan dynamic and made the pagans vicious instead of their usual hippie-dippy selves.

Speaking of viciousness, the film also boasts some wicked medieval battle scenes, complete with swords, maces, axes and even an iron maiden, among other torture devices. Despite the bloodshed being far and in-between, I was surprised how bloody the film actually was, especially in contrast to the subdued tone of the film and stark beauty of the cinematography.

The film looks stunning, from the cobblestoned streets of medieval Europe to the dark woods the characters travel through to the sun-dabbled village they finally arrive at. The mostly cold and bleak visuals echo the overall ominous atmosphere of the film. The grand scope of the cinematography makes me wish I had seen Black Death in a theater, but even on the smaller screen its grandiose scope wasn’t lost.

I liked the storyline because it had an epic feel and because of the themes it explored. As mentioned previously, I liked how the Christian vs. Pagan dynamic was flipped, with the pagans persecuting the Christians instead of the other way around. I also liked how the film showed unwavering faith in the characters as they were faced with temptations and challenges. The film ends on a brutal, downbeat note that was definitely disturbing and shows how evil can corrupt even the most faithful.

The actors gave performances equally intense to the storyline and visuals. Sean Bean is especially good as the God-fearing Ulric, but I also liked Eddie Redmayne’s performance as the conflicted Osmund. In my opinion, though, Carice van Houten stole the show as the village’s necromancer Langiva.

Director Christopher Smith has crafted another unique film with Black Death and is definitively one of the most versatile directors of the horror genre. He gave us the spooky Creep, the darkly humorous Severance, the intense Triangle and now the bleak Black Death. His films are always engaging, entertaining and original, and Black Death is no exception.

Buy it on Amazon!

And Soon the Darkness (2010)

Two American girls are on a bicycle tour through remote Argentina, but decide to set out on their own for the last few days of their vacation. Stephanie (Amber Heard) is trying to get over a recent break-up while Ellie (Odette Yustman) is the more free-spirited, wild one. After the two have an argument, Stephanie leaves Ellie sunbathing alone by an isolated river. When Stephanie returns to reconcile with her friend, she finds Ellie missing. While searching for her friend and getting no help from the local police, Stephanie turns to a fellow American named Michael (Karl Urban) for help. However, it seems that even Michael has his own secrets that make Stephanie distrust him. With no one to trust, will Stephanie be able to find Ellie before this movie turns into another Turistas or Hostel? Hmmmm…I’m betting not…

I was ready and willing to give And Soon the Darkness a chance…I figured it might do something new and put a twist on the whole tourists-in-peril sub-genre. I was even willing to put up with the poor man’s versions of Megan Fox (Yustman) and Scarlett Johansson (Heard). The film started off okay…especially since it was actually filmed in Argentina and the vistas were pretty spectacular. However, the film didn’t offer anything unique in regards to its storyline, which really is a pity considering the beautiful location they had to work with. Instead it limps along the well-tread “torture porn” road with a bit of black market sex slavery thrown in for good measure. If I had wanted to see that I would have just re-watched the excellent Shuttle (watch it NOW if you haven’t seen it yet) instead of sitting through this bland “horror” film.

In fact “bland” is an apt word to describe And Soon the Darkness, as it applies to nearly everything in the film. Bland acting, bland writing, a bland storyline, bland torture…The only thing that wasn’t bland was the direction by Marcos Efron and the cinematography by Gabriel Beristain. Of course, the natural beauty of Argentina may have made capturing its loveliness easy! I would even go so far as to say that if the film was re-cut it could be used as a way to promote tourism for the country (providing they cut out all the kidnapping, unfriendly locals, crooked police and torture…which should be easy since the film doesn’t really boast many of these scenes).

If you’re looking for horror, though, you’ll be sadly disappointed with And Soon the Darkness. While it has some great touristy shots that look like they belong in National Geographic, the film’s storyline fails to evoke any real scares since its premise is something we’ve all seen before (and in better films). It tries for a slow burn but falters in that it never actually goes anywhere. By the time Stephanie figured out what was going on I was beyond caring anyway and I just had to throw my hands up in the air when the story went the clichéd way of so many other films. I was at the very least hoping for a bit of a twist at the end that would differentiate this film from its ilk, but no such luck.

What I do find interesting is that this film is actually a remake of a 1970’s film of the same name, something I did not find out until after viewing the 2010 version. Despite the remake’s failure, I’m just a little bit curious as to how the original compares and may seek it out. If it turns out to be a fantastic film, I may have to actually thank And Soon the Darkness for actually doing something for me besides showing me pretty pictures of Argentina. For now though, the only thing that And Soon the Darkness did was bore me to death…and make me want to visit rural Argentina, even though the film should have had the opposite effect in both instances.

Available on Amazon!

Brain Dead (2010)

Sometimes you just want to shut your brain off, grab a few beers and have a few laughs with some buddies…and that’s where a flick like Brain Dead comes in. I’ve been anticipating Brain Dead ever since I heard Kevin Tenney (Night of the Demons) was attached. However, when I saw the trailer it looked pretty bad, so I put off watching it until now. Big mistake, because I actually had a great time with this low-budget flick!

A small meteor falls to Earth and lands smack dab in the middle of a fisherman’s head in Hicksville, USA. However, inside the meteor is an alien parasite, which looks a lot like a black slug, and it immediately takes over the fisherman’s body and goes in search of brains. The invasion has begun!

Nearby, a bunch of different people (two convicts on the run, two lost hikers, a televangelist and his sweet little follower, etc.) all converge on an abandoned cabin in a convenient plot twist (hey, most movies have ‘em). Their personalities clash, but soon they find themselves banding together to fight the alien/zombie-hybrid threat.

Before I get started with this review, you’ll note the alien slug isn’t anything new – we’ve seen it in films like Night of the Creeps and Slither. I noted this too as the film started, but really, it didn’t make a lick of difference because I still enjoyed the flick! Yes, the plot may be simple and it may have been done before, but it is all in the execution, which Tenney pulls off brilliantly.

Now, back to your regularly scheduled review…

If I had to pick one word to describe Brain Dead, it would be fun…or maybe bloody…or boobilicious…is bloodyboobiliciousfun a word? Well, it should be, because that’s exactly what Brain Dead is! It has over the top gore, tons of lady bumps for the fellas and plenty of rip-roaring lines (Character 1: “I’ve been shot!” Character 2: “Is it bad?” Character 2: “Have you ever been shot when it was good??”).

The characters, though plenty are disposable, are all pretty likable or at least interesting. I’m glad the film didn’t stick with the formula of horny teens in the woods, because the varied characters make things much more interesting. Plus, characters you assume would make it to the end actually become alien fodder, so you are kept on your toes! Thanks to writer Dale Gelineau for keeping things interesting!

The film also keeps its tongue firmly in cheek and doesn’t mind winking at the camera. The fun banter between characters and the over-the-top gore means the film never takes itself so seriously and neither should you!

Speaking of the gore, it is the star of the show. People are split in half, brains get ripped out, heads get blown off and the squirmy alien slugs get busy invading their hosts’ bodies. For a low-budget flick, the effects (with the exception of a few shoddy CGI shots) are pretty impressive.

Brain Dead is one heck of a fun movie. Don’t let the trailer fool you, for the actual film is an enjoyable way to unwind after a long day. Just grab some brews, grab some friends and get ready for plenty of boobs, blood and alien slime.

Available from Amazon!

Babysitter Wanted (2008)

I’ve been waiting (and waiting) to check out Babysitter Wanted for quite some time. Its official release happened in 2008, but it hadn’t hit DVD until this past July. By that point this flick had kinda fallen off my radar and it wasn’t until a friend asked what I thought of it that I remembered this film and eagerly checked it out.

From the cover art you’d assume this is a typical slasher, but remember what your mom told you about judging a book from its cover? I made the same mistake, but was pleasantly surprised by the turn of events in Babysitter Wanted.

Starting off much like the awesome House of the Devil (review), Babysitter Wanted finds the sweet Angie (Sarah Thompson) arriving to her new community college campus to study art history. Her brand new roomie doesn’t have a bed for her, so our dear Angie is in need of some cash…and fast. While poking around the sparse campus, Angie befriends a cute boy, notices some “missing person” posters, and appears to find the perfect babysitting gig. That Friday night she sets out for the isolated farm of the Stanton’s (Bruce Thomas and Kristen Dalton), where she’ll be babysitting their young son Sam (Kai Caster). All seems well until Sam wakes up and eats some unusual food for a little kid…and then the weird phone calls commence and strange noises outside convince Angie that someone is trying to get in. Police Chief Dinneli (Bill Moseley) isn’t much help, but promises to come around to check on Angie. Meanwhile, Angie discovers something unsettling about Sam, the intruder outside and the Stanton’s…will she survive the night?

Ok, I will try not to give anything away in this review because this film is best seen cold, without knowing much about it. I believe the surprise factor of its twists and turns really heightened my enjoyment of it! Be warned, though, spoilers may be present, so proceed with caution!

The film may start off like a slasher, complete with Angie feeling like someone is stalking her. Then when she is babysitting the weird phone calls start…heavy breathing on the other end, but no speaking. Of course, I thought the film was heading into familiar territory, especially when someone started rattling the door and eventually forced themselves into the house and Angie was forced to hide. However, it then took a completely sinister turn that really knocked me off my rocker! The rest of the film was peppered with the occult, torture and black humor. And I don’t wanna say any more because it would give too much away…

For an independent film, Babysitter Wanted looks great…it’s spookily lit, competently shot and features great direction from co-directors Jonas Barnes (who also wrote the film) and Michael Manasseri.

Also excellent is the acting. Sarah Thompson really shines as the innocent Angie who later gets tough as she battles the bad guy(s). Despite her “pure” nature, she’s not annoying and you come to care for her through her sweet and vulnerable nature. As things progress, she forces herself to toughen up and her transformation from innocent to kick-ass comes naturally! I also enjoyed Kai Caster’s performance as the creepy Sam, as well as Kristen Dalton and Bruce Thomas as the parents. Even genre-fave Bill Moseley turned out a good performance, this time as a good guy!

My complaints with the film are few, but I felt the pacing towards the beginning was a bit slow. Also several plot holes bothered me…the roommate angle was dropped pretty quick, so why show it at all? It’s like she was just used for convenience in explaining the disappearances around campus and disappeared herself after that. Also, what ever happened to Angie’s boy toy? He pretty much disappeared until the end and it was never really explained why (unless I missed something?).

Despite these annoyances, I thoroughly enjoyed Babysitter Wanted. It certainly threw me for a loop and uses many different tropes from the horror genre to create surprise and suspense. Despite the many different aspects it uses, it still manages to remain grounded and is a hell of an entertaining good time!

Available on Amazon!

Hellgate (1989)

Hellgate has got to be one of the worst, all-over-the-place horror films I’ve ever seen! From the weird gags to groan-worthy jokes to the silly ghost/zombie/ghost town/magical crystals/revenge storylines that crisscross the mess of the movie, I was shaking my head is disbelief most of its running time. However, though there is no doubt this is a horribly bad movie, it still has a certain charm to it.

The film opens with a bunch of college kids on vacation who have rented a cabin in the woods. While they wait for their last friend to arrive, they tell scary stories, including the local tale of the Hellgate Hitchhiker. In the 1950s, a motorcycle gang kidnapped poodle skirt cutie Josie (apparently, poodle skirts use that rip-away technology that stripper clothes utilize!) and took her to the town of Hellgate. No one besides her dad tries to help her, which results in him killing her by accident. Years later, the father still grieves for his daughter but when a crystal is found that appears to reanimate the dead (and make turtles moo like cows or make the newly undead explode or liquefy passerby), he decides to bring back his precious daughter and get revenge on everyone. Josie now haunts Hellgate’s back roads and tries to lure unsuspecting strangers back to Hellgate, which has become a ghost town.

Meanwhile, it turns out the buddy of the college kids gets lost on the way to the cabin and is seduced by Josie (who strikes weird poses like she’s a newbie on American’s Next Top Model or something), but gets away right before her father zaps him with the crystal’s laser beam (I’m not making this up). He finally makes it to the cabin but convinces his friends to return to Hellgate in case Josie needs help. There they are greeted by the rest of the undead denizens of Hellgate…

This movie is flippin’ all over the place and from the first couple of scenes there is TONS to make fun of (Josie’s lame attempts at escape from the bikers, her black granny panties, the fact that no one helps when she is kidnapped, not even a guy with a big-ass shotgun (!), the silly scene where she is killed when a motorcycle crashes through a brick wall she just happened to be standing in front of – and this was only 5 minutes into the movie!!). The silliness only continues from there…some of it good (the banter between the college kids), some of it groan-inducing (ahem, the mooing turtle).

Despite its weird charm, the film still seems confused as to what it really is – sometimes it plays it straight, other times it plays it outrageous, and it tries to cram way too many sub-genres (ghosts, haunted towns, zombies, etc.) into its already silly story. For the most part it doesn’t work and I was rolling my eyes more than I was laughing or enjoying myself. However, this film is such a disaster I couldn’t look away! Its over-the-top nature (Zombie can-can dancers! Copious scenes of glass breaking in slow-mo! Tons of shots of Josie lying in bed pouting over the escaped college student while her nipple pokes through a huge wine stain on her dress! The crystal’s laser making things go all explody!) and straight-up weirdness kept me watching ‘til the bitter end.

Besides just laughing at the bizarre nature of the film, I will say that the zombie make-up, especially in the scene with the cars (these zombies can drive…but in this movie I guess anything is possible), is pretty kick ass. The scene itself, with the zombies starting to crowd around the college students, is one of the few well-done scenes in the film and really stands out against the rest of the trashiness of the rest of the movie.

If you are looking for a truly BAD movie to torture your friends and neighbors with that you can still laugh it, a good option may be Hellgate. At least you can have a few laughs in between the eye rolling and the exasperated sighs. However, under no circumstances would this ever be considered a GOOD movie! Thank god this was the last film for BOTH director William A. Levey and writer Michael O’Rourke!

Available from Amazon!

Book Review: Jenny's Dance by Bruce Kaplan

Jenny’s Dance was originally published in Australia in 1989, but after the small publisher went belly up the book went out of print. Twenty years later author Bruce Kaplan made a few small tweaks and decided to re-release the book himself in 2009.

Of course if you ask me, the book needs A LOT more editing despite its fascinating story…

After a traumatizing incident, journalist Michael Baird’s therapist recommends he take a nice long vacation. Michael heads to the sleepy resort town of Koala Bay, but it turns out things aren’t quite so quiet there. A violent series of murders is being covered up by the local authorities, murders which just might involve some young children with high I.Q.’s. Though Michael has been warned not to get involved or cause himself any undue stress, his journalistic instincts tell him otherwise and he is soon in the thick of it. Can Michael find out who or what is killing the residents of Koala Bay before either the authorities or the killer(s) kill him first?

Jenny’s Dance has an intriguing sci-fi/horror storyline, but unfortunately tends to get bogged down by sloppy grammatical and punctuation errors and slim character development.

First off, let’s get the obvious out of the way – apparently author Bruce Kaplan has never heard of punctuation or it doesn’t exist in Australia, because he uses it as little as possible. And by “as little as possible” I mean it is usually just used at the end of sentences, if you’re lucky. There are no quotation marks when dialogue is used, there are no apostrophes – neither to mark possession nor to mark the omission of letters (like “shouldn’t” for “should not”), there are no commas to mark pauses in sentences – pretty much the only punctuation that is used is the period at the end of sentences. I understand the creative omission of punctuation in something like poetry, but in a novel it’s kinda vital, doncha think? I had a hard time getting into the book (or taking it seriously) because of the heinous misuse (no use?) of punctuation. And the author even had a second time to fix all this nonsense since this was his second time releasing the book!!

Secondly, the characters all feel and act like stereotypical cardboard cut-outs (with about that much personality). The hero of the novel has a tragic past, but overcomes it to solve the case and win the girl…yada yada yada. There are the typical crooked cops and authorities, the “creepy” kids (who aren’t all that fleshed out and not so creepy) and the underdeveloped female characters. The female characters are probably the flimsiest, and exist in the book to only play mothers or love interests. Psh…I could go on a rant about this alone, but this book has so many other problems that I’ll refrain. Just know that all of the characters are stereotypical and aren’t that well fleshed out, making the reader not care that much about them. Also, things happen to the characters that just seem too convenient. Michael falls in love with a local school teacher awfully fast (their relationship seemed a bit forced and contrived) and he always happens to stumble upon bodies, among other things. At times, even the dialogue and interactions between people in the book seems off and a little stilted.

However, I will say that the storyline was intriguing and was the only thing that kept me reading. Despite the poor use of punctuation and the cardboard characters the idea behind the book was unique and interesting. I liked how Kaplan kept me guessing as to who or what was doing the killing and I especially liked entertaining the fact that it could be kids sucking the brains out of victims. I also thought the final explanation was satisfying and definitely not something you read every day. Though in the end there is a sci-fi twist, I still enjoyed the horror of the story (even though I had to sit through the horror of the formatting).

If you can stomach sacrificing proper punctuation, grammar and decent characters for a cool story,  you may want to check out Jenny’s Dance. The title doesn’t really do the book any favors, nor is it really relevant to the plot, but despite its flaws the actual story isn’t half bad. Just be prepared to slog through a messy manuscript to get to the gem of the story!

Available on Amazon!

Shutter Island (2010)

From the previews, Shutter Island looked like another slam dunk for legendary director Martin Scorsese. It looked like it was chock full of chills and thrills, from the surreal sequence of Leonardo DiCaprio’s character holding a woman who turns to ash to the foreboding look of the island itself. It continues to top the box office and even the reviews for it have been mostly positive.

However, I wasn’t too terribly impressed with this ho-hum thriller.

It’s 1954 and U.S. Marshal Teddy Daniels (Leonard DiCaprio) arrives on the high security Shutter Island, home of some of the most criminally insane patients in the U.S., to investigate the disappearance of a female patient with his new partner, Chuck (Mark Ruffalo).

As Teddy and Chuck get deeper and deeper into their investigation, twists and turns appear around every corner. The man who caused Teddy’s wife’s death is supposedly a patient at the institution, there appears to be some mad Nazi-like experimentation going on with the prisoners, a mysterious lighthouse stands guarded day and night, the missing woman either vanished into thin air or had help, and the patients seem to be cooperating with the doctors to hide something from the Marshals. Through all this, Teddy has nightmares about his wife as her death haunts him.

As Teddy uncovers more secrets, he starts to believe that there is a conspiracy afoot and starts to believe he will never make it off the island.

I had been looking forward to Shutter Island ever since I first heard about it, but after seeing it I can say I expected a little more from it. I’m not saying it’s a terrible film by any means, but if you can guess the big twist just minutes into the movie, it’s safe to say it has some flaws.

Before we get to the flaws, though, let’s discuss its merits. The first thing I enjoyed was the woefully gloomy atmosphere. From the dilapidated cells of the institution to the constant stormy weather (oh ya, they experience a hurricane) and grey surf that pounds the rocky island and drab clothing of the nurses and orderlies, the film just gives off a dismal feeling. And the cinematography – from the dizzying heights of the high rocky cliffs to the claustrophobic cells of the institution – is breathtaking.

However, no matter how pretty it looks the film starts to drag after the first hour or so. There also aren’t very many “scary” instances, though there are quite a few horrifying ones. One occurs when Teddy sees an old woman with only a few clumps of hair on her head as he arrives to the institution (see preview). There are a few other startling patients Teddy has encounters with, but not many. And if you hope to see more scenes like the one where his wife turns to ash in his arms (as seen in the preview) you can probably forget about it – the main focus of the film is Teddy and his partner digging for clues in the rain as to the whereabouts of the missing patient, and later, what the institution is hiding.

While Shutter Island wasn’t a bad film, I was expecting something a bit more complex and interesting from a Scorsese “psychological thriller”. Yet, Shutter Island didn’t really thrill me and I left the theater thinking “meh”. Am I glad I saw it? Sure, but would I ever want to see it again? Probably not.

Available from Amazon!

Flicker (2009)

“When all hope is lost, there’s always a flicker.”

This is the basic premise behind the independent horror film, Flicker, for when there is the tiniest bit of hope there is a possibility of a way out from any horrific ordeal.

Of course, the film’s other tagline is “Keep your friends close and your enemy’s shovel”, which shows some of the dark humor that is injected into an otherwise depraved and hallucinagenic journey of survival against the odds.

Flicker is about a weekend camping trip to a small mountain town that goes horribly awry. Pretty (Katy Houska) and her boyfriend Jack (Babak Tafti) wake up in the middle of the night to discover that their friends are missing and have only left behind a bloodied tent. Their horrific journey leads them to discover maniacal cops, homicidal locals and an unforgiving landscape – all which stack the odds against their survival. Somehow, though, Pretty must find a way to cope with the terrifying elements surrounding her and figure out a way to escape the twisted situation.

Flicker is an extremely interesting indie film that stands apart from typical “survival horror” films because of several artistic and creative aspects its story is infused with. First off is the Grand Guignol way the film and Pretty’s mind are introduced. The opening scene features a demon-like announcer, called Pixie (played magnificently by Courtney Bell) on a stage. Her malevolent presence seems to inhabit Pretty’s mind and dreams and her exaggerated painted mouth, makeup and movements make her appear very threatening. Later in the film, Pretty dreams that Pixie is cutting her in half with a massive whirling saw on stage. These scenes give the film a much more whimsical, yet no less menacing, feel. These Lynchian touches really make Flicker stand head and shoulders above most indie horror flicks.

Also on the positive side are all the amazing performances given in Flicker. Kudos to director and writer Aaron Hendren for getting the actors to give it their all! Katy Houska is perfect as Pretty, who starts off as a normal girl but after her harrowing ordeal starts to fray at the edges until she triumphantly is reborn as an ass-kicking machine (and kudos for the actress for shaving her head for part of the role!)! Houska gives a very strong, commanding performance. As mentioned above, I adored Courtney Bell’s performance as the malicious Pixie. Also on the villain side, Kevin R. Elder gave a very eerie performance as the sadistic and sociopathic cop Buck. All of the members of the weirdo family that kidnapped and tortured people by putting them in an itty bitty wood box were phenomenal as well! In fact, there wasn’t one bad performance in the entire film, something a low budget film should be commended on! Plus, you can tell that the cast involved had a lot of fun making the film. There is an adorable lip synch reel that runs through the end credits with most of the cast bloodied up and singing along to the closing song – it’s hilarious and just makes you love the film even more!

For a low-budget film, Flicker looks pretty damn great. Hendren has a great directorial style that really pulls you into the story and his writing makes you care about the characters. The overall look of the film is very crisp, clean and professional and looks close to theatrical quality. There are some truly gorgeous shots of the forest, lake and surrounding countryside. I also loved the grain and color used and even the special FX look realistic and seamless.

My only complaint with the film is that it had a few pacing problems. I think it needed more padding and more going on in the middle, because things got repetitive with watching Pretty stumble through the woods. I also thought that the Pixie character should have been utilized a bit more towards the middle and end, because her character kind of just drops away with no explanation. I also thought the inclusion of another victim, Misty, was unnecessary and most of the action should have focused on Pretty, her boyfriend and their two friends instead of introducing other victims.

However, besides these few flaws I wholeheartedly enjoyed Flicker and loved its odd, hallucinogenic feel. I especially appreciated that filmmaker Aaron Hendren did something different with the whole “survival horror” subgenre and didn’t give us just another Texas Chainsaw Massacre retread. Flicker comes highly recommended!

For more info on Flicker, visit Egg Murders Productions Official Site!

Sauna (2008)

I’ve always loved period horror films, especially those that features rich history and superstitious folklore come to life. Period horror films are few and far between so, when I first heard about the Finnish film Sauna, set at the end of the 1500’s, I was excited to check it out. I will say the name threw me off a bit, which to me sounded more like a been-there, done-that J-horror than anything else. Yet, when I popped the DVD I was immediately taken in by the eerie atmosphere of Sauna as I let the film chill me to the bone.

Sauna is set in 1595 at the end of a war between Russian and Sweden. A new border between the nations is being mapped out in the far reaches of northern border by a group of Russian soldiers and two Swedish brothers, the hot-headed soldier Eerik (Ville Virtanen) and the more cerebral and sensitive Knut (Tommi Eronen).

One night, Eerik and Knut seek refuge in a local peasant’s home belonging to a father and daughter, but after discovering some religious iconography pointing to the father’s Russian loyalties, Eerik kills the father. Knut tries to protect the daughter from Eerik’s violence by locking her in a shed. As they rejoin the group of Russian soldiers and continue their trek across the dismally gray landscape, Knut begins to see the peasant girl following them. Eerik tells him to snap out of it and confesses he never let the girl out of the shed and left her to die.

As the eerie images of the peasant girl continue to haunt Knut, the group presses on until they come across a village in the middle of a misty swamp. The village is uncharted on the map, so the group decides to stay there to decide whether the village goes to the Russians or the Swedes. Yet, there is something very unsettling about the village and its inhabitants. The weirdness seems to stem from the half-submerged sauna that sits apart from the village. In folklore, saunas are supposed to cleanse you of your sins, but this particular sauna seems to force people to face their sins.

Sauna is a very deliberately paced and cerebral film that asks more questions than it answers. If you are looking for a ghost story filled with jump scares, look elsewhere, because Sauna is a much more of a thinking person’s horror film with many layers and subtexts. It raises many questions about guilt and redemption, salvation and repentance and at what cost can sins be cleansed. While these philosophical questions (and many more) are raised, the film never really seeks to answer them and instead leaves them up to the viewer to decide. The film is very ambiguous and it’s left open for interpretation by the viewer. Personally, I enjoyed the open-endedness of coming to your own conclusions that director Antti-Jussi Annila and writer Iiro Küttner offered the audience and how the consequences that the characters suffered really got you thinking.

I also loved the heavy, ominous atmosphere that Sauna offered. Throughout the entire film there is a palatable uneasiness that creeps up on you. Through the bleak cinematography (lots of gray skies, leafless trees, muddied water, dead grasses, etc.) and several eerie events like the appearance of the peasant girl to Knut as well as several dead villagers that scratched out their own eyes (reminding me of the Bible passage in Matthew 18:9 – “And if your eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to enter life with one eye than to have two eyes and be thrown into the fire of hell.”) and the stark and sinister sauna itself, the film builds tension and unsettles the viewer.

It is this eerie atmosphere where Sauna succeeds the most. Some horror fans might not appreciate its deliberate pacing, but I thought the slowly building suspense was well worth it! And the film’s final frightening images sent shockwaves through my system! Director Antti-Jussi Annila and writer Iiro Küttner, along with the amazing cast, have truly delivered an artistic, emotional and grim horror film, and while it is not for everyone, those who appreciate more cerebral horror films will no doubt enjoy Sauna.

Buy it on Amazon!

Hurt (2009)

So, Hurt’s poster, with a woman peeking out from a dilapidated building, makes it look like another run-of-the-mill slasher horror movie, but I can promise you it is nothing like its poster makes it appear to be. Instead of the typical balls-to-the-wall horror flick, Hurt takes its time building up its dramatic story. Instead of a psycho slasher it’s filled with equally dark and devastating family secrets. It’s always nice when a horror film decides to take the more psychologically terrifying route as opposed to the in-your-face blood and guts approach.

After her husband’s untimely death, Helen Coltrane (Melora Walters) and her two teenage kids, Conrad (Jackson Rathbone) and Lenore (Johanna Braddy), are forced to move in with her brother-in-law Darryl (William Mapother). He lives in the middle of the desert in a dilapidated junk yard, so suffice to say the kids aren’t exactly thrilled, especially Lenore. It also doesn’t help that Darryl is a little odd and seems to have the hots for Helen. And yet, the family is stuck there until they receive a settlement from their late father and husband’s death.

Things get even more complicated when Helen brings home Sarah (Sofia Vassilieva), an abused foster child that her husband had been keeping an eye on before his death. When Sarah arrives the tense atmosphere of the household escalates as sinister “accidents” begin happening. When these accidents become deadly in nature, it is not long before dark family secrets are revealed.

I was immediately pulled into Hurt from the opening sequence of the titles moving fluidly through the dry desert landscape to a mysterious car wreck. The photography was stunning and the setting of the desolate desert really mirrored the Coltrane family – dry, withered, empty. Hurt shows the fragility of family relationships but also the frightening strength love can give, whether it is for good or for bad.

Hurt may not be a traditional horror film, but it’s psychological twists and turns make it for an excellent, low-key thriller.

Though I pretty much suspected from watching the trailer who the bad apple was, it still didn’t detract from my enjoyment of the film. In fact, I just wanted to know why and how the perpetrator committed the heinous acts (one particularly hard scene to watch is when a pet duckling is found with its neck broken). When the motivations are explained it all makes perfect, tragic sense.

My only problem with the film is how the “bad guy” went from a charmed life to being a manipulative and crafty villain in the span of just weeks. The divide just seemed far too wide for a regular person to cross in such a short amount of time, but then again, I suppose the need for revenge can change anyone.

The actors soon helped put these quibbles to rest with their stunning performances. Melora Walters as the weepy, wounded mother just oozed vulnerability, while Johanna Braddy as daughter Lenore brought some backbone to the family. Braddy portrayed Lenore as grieving, but also determined to move on and live her life. She is also the first person to suspect that all isn’t as it appears to be. The wonderful William Mapother played Uncle Darryl with just enough skeeviness to creep me out, but also with a few tender moments to make you rethink him as a monster. Sofia Vassilieva as the not-so-innocent Sarah gave a solid performance. Her character made me uneasy, but it wasn’t until halfway through that I really knew if she was good or evil. When she decides to take that path, though, there is no turning back for her and it’s a joy to watch the transformation!

Just what happens to the Coltrane family? Well, at first beloved family articles go missing or are destroyed. A beloved pet duckling is killed. Things become more sinister as medications are switched, people are impaled on rusty pipes or crushed by the abundant parts of metal in the junk yard and wild wolves zero in on the prey. The villain messes psychologically with the family’s heads, getting them to blame and turn on each other, before waging an all-out brutal revenge scheme on them. Don’t go into this movie looking for blood and guts, but it does have several nice moments. Overall, though, it’s much more about the psychological terror caused by all the first few subtle acts that begins to rip the Coltrane family apart. By the time they realize who is behind the sabotage it is far too late.

Directed by Barbara Stepansky (who also co-wrote the screenplay with Alison Lea Bingeman), Hurt is a tense, psychological thriller that I really enjoyed. Ignore the misleading poster, because Hurt offers much more than its poster shows.

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Carriers (2009)

Am I sick of zombie movies? Well, truthfully, kinda. With the exception of a few entertaining ones this year (Zombieland!), I really wasn’t feeling the gut-munchin’ sub-genre in 2009. It’s not that I hate zombie movies (I in fact LOVE them) but nowadays it seems like everyone is churning out a formulaic film with the same gory set-pieces I’ve seen a billion times before.

So, I was kinda iffy on Carriers, even if “technically” isn’t really a zombie movie (like 28 Days Later, the victims are called the “infected” and have a virus). Like I really need another unoriginal post-apocalyptic movie to put me to sleep! Luckily, Carriers surprised me with its intelligent and emotional take on Armageddon.

Carriers tells the tale of four survivors, two brothers and their two girlfriends, who are making their way across the desolate American landscape after a virus has annihilated most of the population. The virus is extremely contagious and once you are infected and there is no cure and you’re as good as dead. There is not much else to the plot, which pits the survivors mostly against themselves and other humans who are simply trying to survive in a world gone topsy-turvy. There are no big chase scenes, no hordes of infected pursuing the survivors, but, to tell you the truth, I thought this take was refreshing. I liked how the action focuses on the drama that occurs between the still-living characters instead of on the infected.

You can’t go into Carriers expecting it to be another 28 Days Later, Land of the Dead or even Zombieland. It can barely be compared to zombie films, because it really isn’t one itself. There is no breakneck action and it is a very slow moving, quiet film whose intent is to show the horrors of being alone in a world where most people are dead or dying. Writers/directors Alex and David Pastor have created a movie that shows how frightening that loneliness really is.

The direction by the two directors is breathtaking. There are lots of shots of the wide-open road, desolate towns and stretches of empty land as far as the eye can see. When the characters enter buildings that may contain the infected or other squatters, the directors build dread and unease with the claustrophobic and dark settings. They even managed some effective jump scares scattered throughout the film!

The acting is top notch as well. You’ll recognize Chris Pine from this year’s Star Trek as tough older brother Brian as well as Piper Perabo as his girlfriend Bobby. His younger, Ivy League brother Danny is played by Lou Taylor Pucci and rounding out their rag-tag group is Kate, played by Emily VanCamp. Christopher Meloni plays a survivor looking for help for his infected young daughter, but other than a few other people the cast is extremely small. Most of the action is directed towards the four survivors, and they all do a fantastic job portraying a weariness that seems far too heavy for them to endure at their young age.

I know some will complain that nothing happens in the film, but I preferred the horrific drama unfolding with the survivors rather than suffer through another brainless (hehe) zombie/killer virus/end of the world flick. This movie will make you think, could I do that if my life depended upon it? It will make you ponder how scary isolation really is and make you wonder if you could leave your loved ones (or even kill them) if they became infected. How far would you go to survive? Carriers really shows the brutality of the human race but how that callousness comes with a price, even when it is necessary.

Carriers is not your typical horror movie, but in a genre over-saturated with insipid zombie flicks and over-the-top end of the world movies, this isn’t necessarily a bad thing. A downbeat, bittersweet film to be sure, Carriers is something to check out if you want something a little deeper than the typical brainless horror movie.

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The Canyon (2009)

What comes to mind when you think of the Grand Canyon? Wide, expansive spaces? Majestic views? Awe-inspiring vistas? Certainly fear and/or tragedy isn’t one of the first things you think of (well, I hope not anyway!), but the Grand Canyon has had its share of shocking deaths within its deep walls.

According to Wikipedia, “About 600 deaths have occurred in the Grand Canyon since the 1870s. Some of these deaths occurred as the result of overly zealous photographic endeavors, some were the result of airplane collisions within the canyon, and some visitors drowned in the Colorado River. Many hikers overestimate their fitness level, become dehydrated and confused, and must be rescued.”

The Canyon preys upon people’s fear of being lost in the wilderness and of nature in general. It tells the tale of city slickers and eloped newlyweds Nick (Eion Bailey) and Lori (Yvonne Strahovski) who decide to spend their honeymoon taking a mule ride down to the Grand Canyon’s floor. Problem is, they need a permit and permits have to be booked months in advance. They think all hope is lost, but then they meet weathered tour guide Henry (Will Patton), who promises he can procure the necessary permits and guide them down the Grand Canyon. Things start off well, but when they reach the canyon floor disaster strikes when Henry suffers a nasty fall off his mule and is bitten by rattlesnakes. Without their mules and no way to reach the outside world for help, Nick and Lori must find their way out of the canyon…before it is too late.

I’ll be honest, I was intrigued by the trailers for The Canyon. I thought there was a chance for the film, a take on the nature-run-amuck subgenre, to actually be good. Unfortunately, the film is as bland as vanilla and never pushes boundaries.

The best part of the film, the beautiful setting, is the most fleeting and ill-used. Sure, the characters are constantly surrounded by the towering canyon walls, but the Grand Canyon’s vastness isn’t quite captured. I wish director Richard Harrah and cinematographer Nelson Cragg had tried to make the titular character a bit more menacing and scary. It would have been nice to see the Grand Canyon become a character onto itself, but it became secondary to the other natural horrors experienced by the married couple.

Also, the script by Steve Allrich was painfully generic. The only thing that really stood out was the wily character of Henry (which also yielded the only stand out performance, by Will Patton). The characters of Nick and Lori were boring and I couldn’t really root for them because I knew so little about them. Plus, they make some truly bone-headed decisions (hey, let’s climb this cliff that goes hundreds of feet straight up! Hey, let’s not backtrack our steps but try to find another way out!). And, again, the biggest underdeveloped character was the Grand Canyon itself. It was supposed to be this formidable opponent of the married couple, but it really felt like the film could have been set anywhere and it wouldn’t have made that much of a difference. It really is a pity, because the Grand Canyon definitely has the potential to be formidable, but this film just didn’t capitalize enough on its location.

I kept waiting and waiting for The Canyon to become thrilling, but the moment never came. There were some shocking scenes (including a pretty tense amputation scene), but they never amounted to much. The Canyon is just far too safe and generic for me…and wasted a perfectly frightening setting!

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The Thaw (2009)

The threat of global warming is an issue few are ignorant on, but which many still seem to ignore. The melting ice caps, changes in climate and extinction of species definitely point to a troubling future, but it seems that few have done anything to cut back on their environmental impact on the Earth (don’t worry, I’m not going to start preaching at you).

Now, whether you believe in global warming or not, it still falls to logic that all our pollution from various industries must be affecting the environment in some way, or, at the very least, that natural resources are becoming more and more limited as more and more people inhabit our world. You can’t really argue that this doesn’t pose a strain on our environment, but still many of us (including me) have a tendency to turn a blind eye to the destruction of our planet.

Throughout history there have been instances where disease, natural disasters and other catastrophes happen that result in a large percentage of the human population being thinned. Do you ever wonder what the next chaotic event will be? Do you ever wonder if Mother Nature will finally do something to protect herself and lash out at the human population? Well, The Thaw poses that frightening question and answers it with a pretty scary conclusion.

A renowned eco-scientist, Dr. David Kruipen (Val Kilmer) is in remote northern Canada researching the effects of global warming. He and his team uncover the preserved remains of a woolly mammoth, but soon discover that the mammoth is also harboring a deadly 20,000 year-old parasite that quickly infects them.

Meanwhile, a group of three students and Kruipen’s daughter Evelyn (Martha MacIsaac, from The Last House on the Left remake) are on their way up to the research facility. When they arrive via helicopter, they discover the research facility deserted…except for a decaying corpse of a polar bear.

They soon discover that the nasty little parasites are inside the polar bear and lay eggs inside of their victims. Sure enough, they start getting bitten by the parasites, but that’s not all. After the bugs lay eggs inside their hosts, they eat their way from the inside out. The group must find a way to stop the bug’s spread, before they are unleashed upon the world.

The Thaw is a realistic horror film that seems especially relevant in these turbulent times. I like my horror films to be pertinent and socially conscious, and The Thaw fit the bill perfectly. Of course, even those that prefer blood and guts over social commentary will also be pleasantly surprised by the tension-filled The Thaw.

In addition to the relevant story, the pacing of the film is very fast. From the opening scenes of a nasty bug extraction to Dr. Kruipen’s videotaped confessions to a grisly scene of amputation and the nasty bug infestations, my eyes were glued to the screen for the entire running time. The action was tense, and except for a few poor decisions by the characters, everything felt very realistic. The characters were also refreshing and didn’t feature the usual dumb teens. Evelyn was a wonderful final girl who took charge almost immediately and seemed to have more common sense and scientific knowledge than the students. The students were a bit grating at times, but overall their characters’ reactions felt realistic…even if some of their decisions were poor.

As for the actors, most of them did a commendable job, especially Martha MacIsaac as Evelyn. She came off as a spoiled brat in the beginning, but really showed some intense leadership skills as the film progressed. I also have to point out Viv Leacock, who played Bart the helicopter pilot, for his even and brave portrayal…even during and after a nasty amputation. Val Kilmer must also be mentioned here, even if he was only in a third of the film. He played the Doctor very convincingly, with an eerie, unsettling calmness that really forewarned of the calamity that would follow in his wake.

The special effects were the real standouts of the film, though. From the parasites burrowing and squirming into flesh to the mushy egg sacs to the freshly-hatched young devouring their hosts and so on, I was left with the heebie jeebies! Nothing is completely over-the-top, but the gruesome scenes carry with them a sense of reality, like something is possible and could happen…if we aren’t careful. The film reminded me of a mix of Cabin Fever, The Ruins and The Last Winter.

The Thaw is a film that creeps under your skin and squirms there, tickling your mind with its social conscious stance as well as its gruesome set pieces. It reminds us that Mother Nature can only take so much before she reveals her most shocking secrets to us…secrets that could spell humanity’s demise.

Order it on Amazon!

Long Weekend (1978)

Earlier this year I watched the disappointing Nature’s Grave, which I found out was actually a remake of the 1978 Australian film Long Weekend. As I dug a little deeper I discovered that many people held Long Weekend in high regard and it had been called one of the greatest nature-run-amuck films ever made. So after watching the unremarkable remake, which was supposedly shot-for-shot of the original, I felt it was only fair to go back to the source and watch Long Weekend.

Long Weekend isn’t your standard nature’s revenge flick – it is far more subtle, and is more of a psychological struggle between a bickering city couple and the unfamiliar outdoors they’ve chosen as a vacation spot. Some could argue that there is a supernatural element to the proceedings, but everything that happens also has a perfectly logical, natural explanation as well…it just seems supernatural because the city slickers aren’t familiar with nature and definitely don’t respect it.

Before I get ahead of myself, let me give a brief synopsis of Long Weekend:

Peter (John Hargreaves) and Marcia (Briony Behets) are a married couple who are obviously having some issues. To hopefully patch up their marriage they head out to a deserted beach for a long weekend. Peter brings his dog, Cricket, and his trusty rifle to shoot at random stuff as he drinks beer, leaving a trail of litter in his wake. Marcia does nothing but complain that they are far away from her friends and how she would much rather spend a nice weekend at a luxury hotel, all the while burning a hole in the ozone layer as she constantly hoses down the campsite with bug spray. The couple continues to have a flippant disregard for the environment – Marcia flicks cigarette butts everywhere, Peter throws beer bottles into the brush and kills innocent animals (he runs over a kangaroo, kills a mama duck with an errant bullet and shoots a sea cow repeatedly). Soon, the laws of nature come into play and Peter and Marcia face the harsh justice of the jungle.

Long Weekend is a gorgeous film, with wide panning shots of the crystal-clear surf and white sand beach. The pristine environment makes the destruction Peter and Marcia cause that much more ugly and harsh. It’s a very sharp contrast between the food wrappers, cigarette butts, bottles of beer and the once pure coastline. Yet, in the finale when Peter stumbles upon another abandoned campsite we see how humans may come and go but Mother Nature seems to bounce back from any blight humans mar her with. Director Colin Eggleston definitely crafted a socially conscious and stunning film that was way ahead of its time.

As for the story, writer Everett De Roche really involves the audience in his cautionary tale. As mentioned earlier, it has a bit of a supernatural feel to it, but you could also look at it from a very rational point of view as well. It’s all in how you perceive the film, and I like how De Roche left it ambiguous for the audience. I also like how the characters were so unlikable, yet you were still interested to see what would happen to them and even a bit concerned for their safety (even though they brought their misfortune on themselves). All their trouble basically stemmed from poor decisions they made and their unfamiliarity with the outdoors. I mean, who really steals an eagle egg, smashes it and doesn’t expect the bird to come after them or approaches a possum and doesn’t expect to get bitten? Though the two leads make poor decisions, there is a part of you wishing they get out alive and perhaps learn a lesson not to mess with nature. Kudos to De Roche for making us care about such unlikable characters.

Both Briony Behets and John Hargreaves must also be commended for their strong performances in Long Weekend. They are basically the only two characters in the film, plus they are rotten individuals (she is always nagging while he is just an asshole, plus they have their own nasty secrets that come out as the film progresses), and yet we cannot take our eyes away from them. I think the biggest problem with the remake, Nature’s Grave, was the acting. In the remake the two leads didn’t have the fiery chemistry that Behets and Hargreaves possess, nor did they play it as realistically. Hargreaves and Behets really sell the characters and really involve us in the story, making us want to see and learn more about their vile characters.

There is also a lot to discover within the story itself, as the secrets of the secluded beach reveal themselves. The film is slow-paced, but that doesn’t make it bad by any means! Instead, it spends time building the tension and is punctuated by several shocking scenes (Peter’s crossbow accidentally going off and almost hitting Marcia, an aerial attack by an eagle, a menacing shape in the water while Peter is out swimming, Peter’s exploration of an overgrown campsite, and so on). The atmosphere of slowly-building dread is nicely accompanied by a beautiful score that helps accentuate the eeriness and tension of the film.

If you happen to come across Nature’s Grave, I recommend skipping it and renting the far superior original, Long Weekend. Though this is not your typical “animals-run-amuck” revenge film, it is still a breathtaking and tension-filled film that deserves to be seen by those that like their slowly-creeping horror!

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Autumn (2009)

A few years ago I had the pleasure of reading David Moody’s melancholic zombie novel, Autumn. It was both thought-provoking and frightening, relying on its solid character development to make readers really care about the three main characters. Moody’s first few pages about a virulent virus that wipes out 99.9% of the population grabbed me immediately before moving into the novel’s more character-driven focus.

Since I had been such a fan of Moody’s novel, I was very much looking forward to the film adaptation. Autumn is a different kind of zombie story, not your typical story featuring zombies craving brains or flesh. I was drawn to its unique style within the novel, but could that style be replicated on screen?

One beautiful autumn day the whole world goes to hell. In a matter of minutes a vicious virus has killed billions of people and left only a few survivors. In one particular town, survivors meet in a building as the world around them falls apart. Dead people lie rotting about the streets and the survivors know that their meager supplies won’t last forever. One morning the survivors suddenly discover that the dead have risen and are walking aimlessly about. They don’t seem to pose a threat, but none of the survivors wants to get too close.

Finally, three survivors – Michael (Dexter Fletcher), Emma (Lana Kamenov) and Carl (Dickon Tolson) – decide that can’t stick around the city anymore and head into the country to find more isolated digs. They wind up at an old farmhouse that seems to be far away from the undead. Yet, it appears that whenever they make any noise, like driving cars or running a generator, the undead are attracted to the sound. Also, the undead appear to be getting smarter and meaner with each passing day…

I was really hoping that this indie film would preserve the feeling I had when reading the book Autumn, but, alas, it just wasn’t meant to be. This Autumn is sloppily filmed, poorly edited and is pretty much a big mess. Even if you haven’t read the book and are just looking for a good ol’ zombie yarn you will be sadly disappointed in Autumn.

First of all, the opening scenes were some of the most anticlimactic I’ve ever seen in a post-apocalyptic movie. Billions of people are dying every second and this slo-mo intro is the best they could do? The main characters aren’t even properly introduced, instead we sorta-see (the editing makes it jumpy and choppy, so you’re not really sure who or what you’re seeing) where they were at the time of the virus outbreak. To catch a viewer’s attention you really need a strong intro, and Autumn’s was extremely weak…and the movie just went downhill from there.

So, not only was the story poorly set up, but there is no attempt to even get to know the three lead characters! One of the biggest strengths of the novel was that we got to know each of the characters, making us care about what happened to them. This film, on the other hand, takes no time out to even develop the characters, therefore I didn’t give a lick what happened to them. All we see are the characters having conversations with each other, but that just doesn’t shed enough light on who they are, who they lost and what they went through. I usually don’t like voice-over narration in films, but in this instance it definitely would have helped at least introduce the characters and their situations. Without getting a feel for the characters, I didn’t really care what the zombies did with them, which killed any potential tension and made the whole film drag.

The whole story, written by Steven Rumbelow (who also directed) suffered because it wasn’t properly set up and the characters were never developed. After those two things happened I quickly lost interest in the film. I think that Autumn is a very internalized and isolated type of story, so it would be hard to adapt it to the screen. On the other hand, I just don’t think the screenplay was constructed carefully enough and the horrible, haphazard editing definitely detracted from any of its good points. The entire film just lacked cohesiveness and a well-executed plot. With so many things against it, it didn’t help that the film’s pacing was very slow and created lots of boredom.

Another negative thing I must mention about the picture was the atrocious sound quality. I could barely hear what the actors were saying so I would jack up the volume, but the next scene would feature some horrible music (oh, goodness, don’t get me started on the awkward score – none of the music throughout the film made a lick of sense – one scene it felt like I was listening to the score for Star Wars and the next scene felt more like the music from Britney Spears’ Crossroads movie…blegh!) that almost blew out my speakers! Filmmakers – get your audio levels corrected before sending out your films!! It’s annoying as all hell to have to turn up the volume to hear dialogue but have to turn it down again during the next scene when the soundtrack BOOMS!

I wholeheartedly support indie films, but only ones that are actually GOOD and worth your time. There are just too many things wrong with Autumn to even tepidly recommend it. Not even a small role featuring David Carradine (the film is dedicated to his memory) can help this film or make it watchable. Though I felt the makeup of the zombies (or “Meatsuits”) was pretty decent (especially a scene featuring an old woman tied to a bed), overall it still looked amateur. Besides the rotting undead, there’s not many scenes of gore or carnage besides a group of zombies eating a dog. Now, I went into the film not expecting to see much blood, but after being bored for over an hour and a half I was expecting a little something-something to spice things up…but sadly things were never kicked up a notch.

Skip this sad excuse for a film and go read David Moody’s Autumn novel instead! You’ll be much more entertained!

Buy the book on Amazon!

Nature's Grave (2009)

Australia has always captivated me. “The land down under” just seems so wild, untamed and dangerous, featuring some of the world’s most venomous/poisonous animals, insects, reptiles and plants known to man. I’ve always wanted to visit there, but the thought of adding to the destruction of its unique ecosystem just turns my stomach. I don’t want to be just another one of those disrespectful tourists that go tramping through nature, spoiling the region’s natural beauty and tranquility! Not to mention that I might come face to face with some of its more deadly inhabitants!

So, when I received the film Nature’s Grave (releasing August 4th, 2009 from Screen Media Films), which just so happens to be set in breathtaking Australia and shows how Mother Nature can strike back against careless humans, I was eager to check it out! The film opens right away on some jaw-droppingly beautiful shots of Australia’s north coast before cutting to bickering couple Peter (James Caviezel) and Carla (Claudia Karvan), who are taking a long weekend and leaving on a camping trip to try to patch up their disintegrating marriage. Of course, some stormy weather keeps them on the road longer than they expected, so they don’t arrive to the isolated, hidden beach they are planning to camp on until very late at night. Right away Carla gets a strange feeling about the place, but stubborn Peter seems more interested in getting drunk, going surfing and spending time with his dog, Cricket, than working through any of their problems (one of which is that he is a selfish prick).

The couple is supposed to meet some friends there, but they never show. As Peter kills and terrorizes the local wildlife, throws beer bottles into the ocean, hacks away at trees and Carla sprays bug spray over everything and tries to spend most of the time as far away from nature as possible, the surrounding wilderness takes on an ominous feeling. It seems that Mother Nature isn’t taking too kindly to their intrusion. They hear strange crying noises at night, Peter is attacked by an eagle, animals break into their food and something very large lurks in the water just off shore. Carla insists they leave, but Peter can’t be bothered by her warnings and just wants to stick it out.

When they realize just how much danger they are in, it’s already too late and it’s time for Mother Nature to get even…

I wasn’t aware of this before watching Nature’s Grave, but it is actually a remake of a 1978 Australian film titled Long Weekend. From what I hear it has a bit of a cult following and is definitely worth a look. As for Nature’s Grave…eh, not so much, I’m afraid. It is supposedly a shot-for-shot remake of Long Weekend, but I’m guessing it is missing A LOT of the previous film’s subtleties and nuances.

Nature’s Grave is directed by Jamie Blank, who directed the awful Storm Warning and the mediocre Valentine and Urban Legend. Often times the film feels flat, and feels like it’s missing any kind of emotional connection with the audience. There are some beautiful shots of the Australian wilderness and wildlife, but at times it just didn’t feel like there was enough. I also thought the film’s creepy moments lacked punch and could have used with a few more scares.

The story, written by Everett De Roche (he also wrote the original Long Weekend), moves at a slow-but-sure pace, and I actually enjoyed the slowly-building dread. However, the characters are highly unlikable, with an over-the-top performance by Caviezel that feels like he’s never taking his character seriously to Karvan’s strangely reserved character that doesn’t even fight back when her husband tells her to “go fuck yourself”. Neither character is interesting and you don’t want to root for either, which kills any kind of tension that De Roche tried to build in his story. Without anyone to root for to survive, I found myself waiting for Mother Nature to extract her revenge on these two characters.

Though there are a few creepy scenes – one where something is lurking in the ocean’s crystal blue waters, another where a dead animal is seemingly moving of its own accord and, towards the end, another where Peter finds some other “campers”, most of the “revenge” that happens occurs because of the two characters’ doing. In the end, it’s really their own stupidity that catches up with them as opposed to Mother Nature. This really is a pity, because I was really hoping to see the characters ripped apart by animals or plants after how disrespectfully they treated nature.

Nature’s Grave isn’t that memorable of an affair. Though it has a few spooky scenes, the performances of the two actors and the way their characters are written are just grating and make the film hard to sit through. And when their final curtain finally comes, it just doesn’t feel vicious enough for what you’ve had to put up with the last hour and a half. My advice? Seek the original Long Weekend out…it has to be infinitely better than its remake, Nature’s Grave.

Buy it on Amazon!

My Little Eye (2002)

You really can’t seem to flip channels without coming across some reality show. Whether you are Keeping Up with the Kardashians, hanging with The Girls Next Door, taking in Deadliest Catch or another one of the hundreds of reality shows, there is a glut of reality programming that shows no signs of slowing down. Are we really that obsessed with watching other people’s lives instead of living our own?

Our reality show contestants in My Little Eye certainly hope that’s true, especially since they’ve entered in a contest where they must survive six months in an isolated, creepy old house with every second of their tenure there filmed for an eager, voyeuristic audience. At the end of the six months, they will all get a nice paycheck of $1 million…but there’s a catch. If any of them leave before the six months are up, then none of them get any of the dough.

The film picks up during the last week or so of their six month sentence, and everyone is particularly antsy. Snow is falling thick and heavy outside and supplies are dwindling. Not to mention that the myriad of cameras installed within the house follow their every move. With just mere days to go, strange things start happening. One of the guys gets a letter saying his grandpa has died and funeral services will be held before his time on the show is up. Another girl finds an eerie phrase from her childhood written on one of the windows and a bloody hammer in her bed. The group begins receiving strange “supplies” – like a box of bricks and a loaded gun. Then, a lost skier stumbles upon their house and claims he’s never heard or seen anything about their reality show. Is the reality show company responsible for these strange occurrences? Are they trying to trick them out of their hard-earned cash? Is it all being done to boost ratings? Or is something more sinister going on?

Horror films that feature a reality show usually don’t fare too well (see Halloween: Resurrection), but My Little Eye is different. It is full of tension, interesting characters and an intriguing storyline that will have you guessing until the end. Though it starts slow, with the group suffering from cabin fever from being cooped up in a house all this time, it does a good job in slowly building dread. Things just get creepier and creepier, until the satisfying ending that will just leave you saying, “wow…”

I also love how the film is shot and all the action is captured on the cameras that are wired throughout the house. Whether the action occurs in creepy green-tinged night vision or is seen through a grate in the bathroom, it really gives the film a voyeuristic edge, almost as if you were watching a snuff film. I’m not sure what the logistics were in the shooting of the film, but it truly does look like it was all shot on those security cameras! Fantastic job by director Marc Evans!

The story, written by David Hilton and James Watkins (Eden Lake and the upcoming The Descent 2), is a slow-burn but one that immediately sucks you in, especially when strange occurrences start happening and the pace picks up. There are also a few nice surprises toward the end that caught me off guard and grab your attention!

The characters are all pretty likable or at least interesting. There’s bad-boy Rex (Kris Lemche), sexy Charlie (Jennifer Sky), all-American Matt (Sean CW Johnson), sensitive Danny (Stephen O’Reilly) and skittish Emma (Laura Regan). Their interactions and relationships with each other ring true and it really does feel like they’ve been roommates for the last 5+ months. Each of them has their own dark secrets, which slowly come to light as they are tested in their last week or so of the show.

The acting was surprisingly great, with all the actors giving solid, believable performances. Laura Regan really gave a stand-out performance as the fragile Emma, but the rest of the cast was equally impressive. There is even an appearance by Bradley Cooper (The Hangover, Midnight Meat Train) where he plays the lost skier. It was quite a pleasant surprise to see him in this film!

Now, this film is more about building tension than showering the audience with blood, so there isn’t that much gore. Again, though, this doesn’t hurt the film at all! Instead, when the grue finally does show up at the end of the movie it makes much more of an impact than had it been shown throughout the entire film! There is one particularly nasty scene at the end involving someone’s head getting unexpectedly blown open that is really an “oh sh*t!” moment!

My Little Eye is a suspenseful film that relies on the mystery of the characters’ situation to keep your attention. Its slow-burn works extremely well in building up a tremendous amount of tension, and it also helps that we actually care about the characters and want to know as much as they do who is pulling the strings and behind the strange occurrences. Not too many people have seen this movie, and that’s quite a shame! It is a gem of a horror movie that deserves more fans!

What do I spy with My Little Eye? A fantastic horror movie, that’s what! Now go check it out!

Available from Amazon!