Friday, March 10, 2006

The Locker/The Locker 2 (2003)

In my slight obsession for all Asian horror-themed films, I decided to check out The Locker, even though it looked like a gigantic Ju-On rip-off. I believe I am in the minority when I say that Ju-On is one of my all time fave J-horror films. Ju-On had me covering both my eyes AND ears in fear. I had nightmares...I was scared! It still gives me the shivers when I watch it, and I still can't help hiding in the blankets with my hands covering my eyes it creeps me out so much.

Anyway, back to the original point of The Locker...I ordered it from Netflix, and when it came I found that the DVD contained both The Locker and The Locker II! Oh happy day! The Locker begins with six college-age kids on a camping trip - all about hooking up, drinking beer, and having a grand time until one of the girls hears a baby crying...No one believes her, of course. The next day they all go back to the city. One of the girls has stashed her schoolbooks and such in a locker which is believed to be a lucky locker that grants wishes. Well, soon everyone from that happy camper group is dead, except for one girl. Seems they all died of shock (ok, so they've thrown some Ringu copying in here as well...) The locker is evil, EVIL!! Soon we discover that about 5 years ago an abandoned baby was found in the the spirit of the baby girl (now 5 years old) is out for revenge! Child-sized handprints show up everywhere and the sound of a baby crying is frequently heard.

Ok, kids freak me out as it is -- but this movie just didn't do it for me. Murderous 5 year olds with long black hair just don't scare me. Just kick the little bugger! It had the same old tricks as Ju-On, tho much less scary. Blah, The Locker, Blah!!

The Locker II wasn't much better - one of the girls who died in the previous movie used to tutor a middle school girl, now the middle school girl is intent on solving the mystery of the locker. This one seemed pretty ho-hum as well, except for the scene where the three bitchy and popular girls are attacked in a parked car by the ghost. It is much better than it sounds, believe me!

You know, I actually felt really bad for the 5 year old locker ghost. Her mom didn't want her so she shoved her in some dirty and isolated locker, and now people keep demanding good luck from her. Well, SCREW THAT! I'd seek revenge too and cause a bit of a ruckus. I still don't see how people could be shocked to death by this lil' ghostess (did ANYONE ever read that book about ghostesses with toastesses? It was one of my faves growing up, but I believe it was an older book - looked like from the '50s or '60s or sumthin). She was just soooo adorable - except for her Cousin It hair - girl needs a trim! If I had a confrontation with her, I would want to give her a big hug! Alas, that's what the lone survivor did in the first Locker, and she ended up dying anyway in the sequel. Psh...I still woulda shown the love!

Bottom line, if you want second-rate Asian horror and are petrified of kids, especially ones with super crazy Cousin It hair, rent The Locker and The Locker II. Otherwise, I really wouldn't bother...I'm already forgetting about these movies.

Order the two-pack on Amazon!

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